You do not come dramatically, with dragons
That rear up with my life between their paws
And dash me butchered down beside the wagons,
The horses panicking; nor as a clause
Clearly set out to warn what can be lost,
What out-of-pocket charges must be borne,
Expenses met; nor as a draughty ghost
That’s seen, some mornings, running down a lawn.
It is these sunless afternoons, I find,
Instal you at my elbow like a bore.
The chestnut trees are caked with silence. I’m
Aware the days pass quicker than before,
Smell staler too. And once they fall behind
They look like ruin. You have been here some time.
(‘To Failure’, Philip Larkin)
Sometimes you just have to accept defeat and admit that you failed and today, my grade 3 lesson was most definitely a failure.
I had a proper grade 3 class today for the first time in several weeks. Classes were missed for a variety reasons; first, they were revising and then taking their speaking tests; second, they had to sit their final exams; and third I was told by my co-teacher last week, at the last minute, to play games with them. The reason for the game class being that they had just finished their exams and deserved a break. So the lesson that I gave today, or tried to give today, was ready to be given last week before my co-teacher pulled the plug. Over the past week I have not stopped tinkering and agonizing over it. This is an important lesson because I am going to use it for my methodology assignment. I wanted everything to be carefully planned and crafted.
In the end, isn’t it always the way, all my planning and strategizing counted for naught. I have one solitary grade 3 class on Tuesday. All my other grade 3 classes are at the end of the week, bunched together on Thursday and Friday. But not class 3:3, they occupy the last period of the school day on Tuesday’s; the last class before they are liberated from school for another day and get to go home. Period 7, 3.25 to 4.10. I should have known there would be a problem. Historically, this class has always been difficult to manage. I assume that it being the last class of the day has a lot to do with this; they are tired and restless and difficult to motivate or engage by the time I see them. In other blog posts I have described previous, difficult lessons with this class. The problem is compounded by my co-teacher Mrs. Lee. Mrs. Lee must be getting close to retirement and whilst a nice person and a lovely lady is not as accomplished in classroom management as some of my more authoritarian co-teachers. The students tend not to listen to her a lot of the time and make only token gestures towards following her instructions.
However, today’s class was particularly bad. I arrived early, I was well prepared and organized but immediately I could tell the atmosphere in the room was not going to be conducive to completing a lesson. Straight away Mrs. Lee said she had to go to a meeting and promptly left never to return. Typically, without a co-teacher the students are more difficult to control. However, I don’t think her presence today would have made much of a difference. Like stubborn mules the students refused to do anything; they ignored all my instructions; they didn’t pay attention to anything I said; they didn’t listen or in fact do anything I asked; overall, they seemed completely indifferent to my presence. At one point I counted seven students slumped over their desks asleep, completely oblivious to the lesson happening around them. At another point I realized two students were just sitting listening to an MP3 player. I noticed a girl who was intently reading a ‘Twilight’ novel until I interrupted her. And nearly everyone else was chatting to the people around them for the whole duration of the lesson. Today was the first time I have come close to losing my temper. I was genuinely angry by the time this lesson ended. I was even angrier at myself for letting them make me feel angry.
I think the problem is that they have essentially finished middle school. They have sat their last exams and in a few short weeks they will leave for good. There is simply no incentive for them to participate in class. Both my grade 3 co-teachers told me I should just give ‘easy, game lessons’ from now until the end of the term. I would be happy to do this but as I am still giving the grade 1 & 2 students their speaking tests I needed to give a lesson to the grade 3 students so that I can write about it for my TESOL methodology assignment.
Unfortunately, there is just nothing to write about in relation to this class because they didn’t participate at all. It didn’t matter how I had planned to activate schema or that I had planned to use a variety of MIC and CI techniques. It didn’t matter that I had spent time tailoring the different activities and finding suitable pictures. None of the planning and preparation mattered at all in the end.
I would love to know how this class could have been turned into a successful lesson.
Now I am left deeply concerned about my upcoming grade 3 lessons. I can’t even assess whether there is a problem with the lesson itself because there was just no engagement with it. If my grade 3 classes on Thursday go the same way as today’s class I will have to drastically rethink the lessons I will give on Friday.